The value of me in you guys heart?

After yesterday sleepless night,i was looking at the ceiling in my room and i begin to think that what are my value in my friend heart?An unresponsible guy that leave everything behind?A coward that run aways when facing problem?An useless guys that always jealous to other people?After all this thinking come to my mind at a sudden and i cannot sleep the whole night.....Maybe all my thinking was true also.....Maybe that the reason that my friend leave me?Maybe i should fade away from this world?I realy dun't know......